FWIW

[my_window_seat]

I'm all about empathy, but Fuck Sympathy.

There is context here, but that's really not important.

I think it's a waste of time to try to get someone to feel better when it's not really a realistic objective.  Funny that this comes up now, so recently after my musings on depression, but I think I am drawn to that demographic - like attracts like, etc.

But I'm not going to feel sorry for you.  Any of you.

I will empathize with you, because I honestly know what it feels like to take stock of my 'accomplishments' and feel that the columns of negative outweigh the positive.  I know that in my life, the things that I've done wrong and the people I have wounded are a debt that will never be settled.  I am going to die owing, and that won't change even if I cure cancer and solve world hunger while single-handedly destroying AIDS.  So I know what it feels like to feel like it's all worth next to nothing in the long run.

I get it.  I really do.

But I will not feel sorry for you.

Being another member of a cheering squad in the Rah Rah Up With Self-Esteem bleachers won't make fuck all difference in anyone's life. 

It's up to you to do that.

If you'd rather collect Get Well cards from people who feel sorry for you, have fun putting together a scrap book and continuing to let you be the thing that keeps you from being - You.

I empathize. 
There isn't a day that goes by, even the good ones, that I don't feel like there will always be something missing in my life.  That I won't ever be anything, mean anything.

And I get up every day, and I keep going,

It may seem like a slap in the face, but I expect more of the people I bother to care about -

I expect them to be who they are, as great as they are, despite how they 'feel'.

I will not feel sorry for you.

Because I believe that you are better than that.




Thus endeth the non-lesson.

Comments

[jarmon.livejournal.com]

Um. Thanks?

[my-window-seat.livejournal.com]

Weccome.

Punk.

*hug*

[jarmon.livejournal.com]

Shouldn't you be in bed.

I'm re-writing again. Those initial pages. Well nothing happened. May as well start strong.

[my-window-seat.livejournal.com]

Made the mistake of taking a 5 hour nap when I got home. Talk about accomplishing nothing - I'm pissed.

Let me know when/if you need proofing assistance.

Bed now. Argh.

[jarmon.livejournal.com]

I'm sure I will. I might bamf the work I do tonight over. Aiming for 12 pages before sleepy time.

Up to 4 right now.