my_window_seat: (Default)
So then.

There was no 'advocate' for the rehearsal.  When Lou told Lisa that Jen could come if Lisa really felt like she needed it, but Jen wouldn't be allowed to give artistic notes 'as 'that is ~D's~ job' -  Lisa called Jen and told her not to come after all. 

Lou evidently put the PH33R in Lisa, because the Diva Doll went up on the shelf and out of sight.  Lisa stonewalled me on the adult talk we were supposed to have before rehearsal (under Lou's strict orders) and that made me fear the worst -

But she got her ass on that stage, and it was immediately evident that she had done her fucking homework.  She's offbook for all but the last scene, and she's made some really great choices for the new material - in all, I was very impressed and spared no expense telling her so.  Along with 4 pages of notes.  80% of which were pointing out the moments that best resonated based in her work (what I liked and why), 10% places that can be tightened, 10% reviewing scenes we need to tweak or tinker with.

All in all, a good night's work.  The first and only good night's work we've had since Lou left town, aside from the one rehearsal during Lou's 8-hour lay-over.

Personally, I'm glad we didn't have to have an Encounter Session.  The fact that she was being non-communicative at first made me worried that we were still at square one, but bottom line - she did the fucking work.  To me, that's the important part of all of this.   Personally, I could give a shit if we end up being 'friends' out of all this.  With all the crap I've been through over the last week for this, I don't care if I never see her again except on a stage somewhere (she's very talented).  But as long as we can get through this process professionally and come out of it with a show that Lou can be proud of - that's why we're here, baby.  That's what it's all about.*

I'm learning a lot out of it, too.  It'll take me a while to put it all together, but - everything's a learning experience.

This at least is the good kind of tired.




* Okay - so there's also the part where I get professional credit as Assistant Director on the world premiere of a show by an acclaimed and well-respected emerging playwright - but hey, let's just stick with the humanitarian part.  From the house, that angle plays better.  :-O

my_window_seat: (I am crushing your head)
Fourth FUCKING phone call of the day from Lou.

Note:  I still love Lou to death.  She's not what's driving me fucking crazy.

Latest Newsflash:  There will be an 'advocate' in tonight's rehearsal so that Lisa feels 'safe'. 

Safe?

SAFE?!?

From WHAT?

I haven't given her any acting notes, because she hasn't yet come to rehearsal prepared enough to actually do anything worthwhile all week.  Have I bitched her out for this?  I haven't even given her a stern fucking GLANCE for it.  I haven't said anything even REMOTELY negative to her - and of this I am **absolutely certain** - believe me, I know that I can be a 4-star, Grade-A, Brass-Plated Bitch - but Lisa's gotten nothing but the Softer Side of Sears from me the ENTIRE time I've worked with this piece -

FOR FUCK'S SAKE - I'm harsher on the KIDS I work with!!! 

Seriously - you all know how much I question and doubt myself about just about everything I do - but I KNOW that I did NOT cause the descent into pure fucking INSANITY that this has turned into.

The 'advocate' coming tonight is one of Lou's roommates (Jen) - and Lisa called Jen and asked her to come to rehearsal without even talking to Lou!  Lou was not happy.  But Lou says - and I agree - that if Lisa needs a fucking security blanket - fine - let her have it.  But Lou told Jen to come to rehearsal at 7:30 insted of 7:00 - because Lou is adamant that Lisa and I have a grown-up sit-down talk and get this shit dealt with and handled so we can get some fucking WORK done.

So in T-Minus 50 minutes, I get to see if I can Defuse the Diva.

Jumped up Jesus in a Chariot Driven Sidecar.

IT'S JUST A GODDAMN SHOW, PEOPLE!

FUCK!!!!!
my_window_seat: (Mask)
More boring crap about a show I haven't even detailed at all in this journal, so none of this will make any sense.  Scroll on, folks.

Third phone call of the day from the director (Lou).  Jesus CHRIST.

The show is being postponed for a week so that we can have a week after she gets back into town to get all this stupidity worked out.

I still have to go to rehearsal tonight and see if I can't reestablish some kind of working relationship with this actress (Lisa).  At this point, Lou feels like Lisa is being a bit of a diva, an opinion that I can only whole-heartedly agree with, and I am NOT looking forward to tonight, as I am not comfortable with all this touchy-feely tiptoe-around-the-artist crap.  Lou is really the only reason I'm still in on this project at this point - Lou's been bending over backwards, from 1,500 miles away no less, to try to keep this project together.  It's important to her, she's given me her trust and I'm going to do my best to live up to that.

I am NOT looking forward to tonight, though.  A double dose of vitamins hasn't helped my energy.  Still being overshadowed by schoolwork that SHOULD have been out of the way by now (the semester is OVER for fuck's sake, and do I get a break yet?  Do I?  I do NOT) - still not being able to get enough sleep - still trying to juggle an armload of responsibilities that conflict with each other, most of which STILL aren't in any way helpful in alleviating the imminent financial crisis looming ahead caused by DOING ALL THIS STUPID SHIT FOR FREE  -

I'm tired.  I'm just - tired.

Going to try to take a nap, take another stab at my paper, and review the script again before going in to deal with Lisa.

I would really just like a nice blanket-lined box to curl up in for a good couple days right now.
my_window_seat: (To Much of the Stupid)
Had an enormously bile-filled post last night that I changed to My Eyes Only to spare you all the acid splashback.  You're welcome.

Just spent an hour on the phone with the director (Lou).  While I would personally love nothing more than to give this project the finger and walk the fuck away, I committed to it, and Lou is out of town and that's why she left it in my hands - thinking that things would be fine.

I'm fucking exhausted, and it's only noon.  Absofuckinglutely FABulous.

I'll probably find occasion to rescind this comment from time to time - but I still think kids are easier to work with than adults.

Back to paper writing.

God I'm tired....
my_window_seat: (Dear God Make Everyone Die)
I'm just not going to go into it.  I'm not.  It's taken the last couple hours to come down, and I'm just not going to go back there.

I will say this:

* My neighbor?  Awesome human being.  There's nothing like the righteous indignation of a good friend to put things into perspective.

* Actors?  Goddamn FUCKING CHILDREN.  Tonight, I remembered why I got out of theatre for TEN YEARS.

I won't go into - the insults, the feeling completely discounted and worthless and -

Hey, I said I wasn't going to.

Did I mention that my neighbor rocks?

Yeah.

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